I'm not much of a drinker, and in the past year and a half have probably barely consumed enough total alcohol to constitute a full drink. So it was in stone-cold sobriety and good fun when I went to a party and wore a lampshade on my head. I'm a big fan of old-school physical comedy, and like the pie I hit someone with a while ago, a lampshade seemed like another quintessential comedy prop, one I hadn't experienced in all its comedic glory. It helped to have been at a small, civilized party with several other non-drinkers. Those who saw it regarded it in stride and accepted my explanation: that I'd never done it before, so I was doing it now.
The photo is on the way, so please accept this crude but earnest placeholder: